Life is like a dramatic river flowing through the rapids.

I have gained so many things in life, and lost them again, and gained others, and lost them again.

I do not predict the future. Let’s wait and see.

May I suggest something?

In some countries (like Germany) they have special hotels which are essentially free or low-cost, which have the sole purpose of helping women or people in a difficult, abusive relationship gather some distance from their abusive partner. In German they’re called “Frauenhäuser” (women’s houses). Maybe such a thing exists where you live, too?

I’m sorry for your encounter. They were an asshole and it’s not your fault. Such encounters exist, but are rare. I hope you will be able to see that these cases aren’t the “normal scenario”, and not something that you will always have to expect. Hope that helps you :)

I just wanted to say I read the whole post with an incredibly southern accent.

Experiences: Why did you do it, how did you feel afterwards, did you regret it, did anything change in you afterwards?

Isn’t the internet anonymous enough for you?

I wanted to add that i really really really did not want to hurt her. I’m just that dense (even if you can’t imagine it) and my gut feeling told me that would be a fine thing to do.

I’ll go first:

Yes, but not in bad faith. I really liked a girl in school and at some day after school (we were sitting together to do some exercises) I awkwardly approached her and tried to kiss her. To my defense: My autism is strong and doesn’t tell me when things are awkward. She pulled back and I realized how shocked she must be, so I awkwardly apologized. She said “yeah yeah it’s fine”. and i left. The next day, however, she avoided me and we didn’t talk afterwards.

I’m guessing that it was in fact not fine, and I’m sorry for making her feel bad. I’m not sure what to do, I never saw her again because my parents moved away so I changed school afterwards. I’m thinking about reaching out to her and apologizing again, but I’m not sure whether that’s such a good idea (it happened more than a year ago and I’d have to count on chance to figure out a way to contact her.)

Call me a nutcase but this story is true. Save yourself all the “ooh you’re such a bad person, you shouldn’t have done that”. Can anybody relate to this experience? Has anybody direct experiences being on the other side of this? I’d like to hear them. Thanks.

Yes. I’ve once ghosted a close friend of mine, because I had difficult health conditions and needed a break from school (that’s where we met). I didn’t want any human contact, so I just isolated myself and changed my phone number. It was unfair towards her, because she was a really likable person, but I just couldn’t handle any human contact at the time. I regret not telling her.